Tell us a little about yourself 

My name is Junaid Bhatti and I am a tutor at the Writing Center and the Math Lab. I was born in Pakistan and moved to Baltimore when I was very young. I am junior Biology major and am currently on the pre-medical track at UMBC.

Tell us about how you are involved on campus.

Along with tutoring, I am also a TA for a few classes. I also work in a pair of on-campus research labs and am an active member of many clubs and organizations at UMBC.

How and why did you get involved in being a tutor?

This is my fourth semester as a tutor for the LRC.  A while back, I got an email informing me that I was recommended by my English professor to work in the Writing Center. I always enjoyed tutoring, so I decided to apply and was fortunate enough to get the position. The same sequence of events occurred the following semester, however, this time it was my Calculus teacher that had recommended me for the Math Lab. Along with Math and English, I started tutoring many other courses such as Chemistry and Biology.

What is your favorite thing about being a tutor?

Knowing that you are making a difference. Often times students will come in with absolutely no clue on how to do something. By the end, however, they seem to understand that same concept so well that they’d teaching their fellow peers about it. Seeing students make progress and getting the results they want is really rewarding as a tutor.

Why should students utilize the tutoring?

It helps you either learn something you don’t understand or reinforce your knowledge on some concept that you are fairly comfortable with. Even if you feel you have a good enough grasp on a certain concept, I would still encourage you to drop by because it usually enhances what you already know. There are really experienced tutors that have taken and excelled in courses they tutor and will give you tips from the perspective of a fellow student who has already been through that situation. On a side note, it’s also surprisingly a really great place to meet people. Many students will come in for tutoring and end up leaving with a new friend or two with whom they usually form a study group with. This can be really helpful in some of those upper level classes.

What advice would you give students about how to prepare for a tutoring session?

Try attempting some of the assignment/problems (Math Lab) or drafting part of your paper (Writing Center) ahead of time. If you made previous attempts, you usually have a better idea of the material when the tutor is going over it due to that preliminary exposure and are more likely to completely understand it by the end.

When and where can someone work with you through the Learning Resources Center?

For Fall 2016, you can find me at the Writing Center and Math Lab on Wednesdays.  

A reflection by Women’s Center staff member Prachi Kochar on identity and “fitting in”. How do we navigate identities that can fit into multiple categories of nationality, ability, race, etc. at once? Or identities that do not perfectly fit into these categories, spilling out and crashing into each other? 

This summer, I went to India for my cousin’s wedding, and it was a long trip both physically (twenty-four hours of traveling, with a layover!) and mentally. Even though it has technically been over for months, it continues to affect the way that I think and view the world. It has deepened my understanding of how I navigate the world, both in terms of my physical location and in terms of social situations and relationships.

Before this trip, I had assumed that India was nothing more or less than a second home to my parents, that it was their equivalent of me coming home from school for winter or summer vacation. However, after an interaction with some distant relatives, my mother turned to me and shook her head, saying “They act like we’re not even Indian!” Her comment surprised me because my parents always had been the epitome of Indian to me. In their spare use of Gujarati and Marathi words, I had heard the voice of India, my motherland. Through their cooking, through the bhinda, rotis, and dal, I had tasted my heritage. And in their stories about their childhoods, about school, about their friends, everything, I had experienced life in India.

Mehndi ceremonies with family in India

Even though I had known they had lived in the United States for the majority of their lives, eventually becoming US citizens, I was still amazed. My mother explained to me, “We’re too American for the Indians, but then we go home and we’re too Indian for Americans.” At this point, it was difficult for me to not laugh and/or cry out loud, because I had said that same sentence nearly word-for-word in multiple contexts. Later, once we had gotten a break from the wedding chaos, I asked my parents about the exchange again. They both expressed similar feelings, even though they’d had very different experiences of growing up in India and even though my mother is technically South African. Not American enough, but also not Indian enough, they echoed. In the end, I was left with one question playing through my head over and over. What does “enough” mean?

For me, that question makes up the chorus of the soundtrack of my life. I am not Indian enough. I am not American enough. I am also not deaf enough. I am not “hearing” enough. I am not assertive enough. I am not quiet enough. And so on.

Let me back up here. Who or what am I not enough for? may be the question on your mind. And simply put, it is everyone and no one at the same time, including myself.

As a deaf Indian-American woman, I am often subjected to a set of expectations that vary based on context and location.

For example, Indian-Americans often make up the face of “model minorities”. They are expected to excel at math, sciences, and are seen as not facing discrimination in contrast to other minority groups. This “model minority” stereotype is used to perpetuate anti-Blackness among other things, while ignoring that Asian-Americans are not a monolithic group. At the same time, being a woman comes with its own set of expectations that often clash and interact with stereotypes of Indian-Americans. Indian-American girls are often viewed as constantly being oppressed by their vile misogynistic parents and threatened with arranged marriage. It is necessary to recognize that this is an issue that some Indian-American women do deal with, but presenting it universally affecting only one group trivializes the complexity of the problem and pretends that it does not exist in other communities.

My poster for the Telling Our Stories project.

Deaf and hard of hearing people also face their own set of stereotypes. For example, one of the most highly touted statistics about the woeful situation of d/Deaf people is that the average deaf high schooler has a fourth-grade reading level, never mind that the average American adult has an eighth grade reading level (in addition to several other issues with this statistic). In addition to being stereotyped as uneducated, d/Deaf people are imagined to be figuratively — if not literally — voiceless. Even though many d/Deaf people are not able to verbally speak, this does not mean that they cannot express themselves through American Sign Language, through writing, through a variety of other formats, just as eloquently as any hearing person can with their voice. Like many other minority groups, d/Deaf people are placed into rigid, narrow boxes that define who they should be, rather than definitions that stretch to accommodate the wholeness of who deaf people actually are.

I find it difficult enough to deal with one set of stereotypes by itself, and dealing with multiple collections of stereotypes presents a shifting set of expectations that feels like it is always changing to trap and trip me up. Navigating all of these stereotypes is something that I do every day, with a broken compass and inaccurate map. For example, when I am in class, I often hesitate to raise my hand and speak up because I worry that I may be monopolizing class time by speaking up too much. I also hesitate because I feel that I’m not “hearing” enough. More specifically, even though I am able to speak using my voice, I have a strong “deaf” accent (with an inability to discriminate between “l” and “n” or say words beginning with “st”), and I often worry that I am annoying others by making them work harder to understand me.

At the same time, I wonder if I should be less quiet, in order to not play into perceptions of Asian-American women as voiceless and invisible. I feel that I should speak freely in class, using American Sign Language and the interpreter to voice for me instead of using my own voice, fully embracing my Deaf identity even though it still feels itchy and uncomfortable to me. With all of these contradictions whirling around in my head, I often end up just doing the old half raise of my hand and hoping (or fearing) that the professor will call on me.

I am not alone in these conflicted feelings. Feeling trapped between two worlds is also an issue that affects many from immigrant families, especially people of color who are visibly marked and judged as an “other” in the United States. Consider Nina Davuluri who was crowned Miss America in 2013, becoming the first South Asian American to hold that title. Immediately after she was announced as the winner, she was the target of various racist attacks on social media, illustrating how many people of color are often not seen as fully American, despite being born and raised here. We are expected to assimilate, but even when we conform perfectly to standards of “Americanness”, we are still seen as outsiders, constantly receiving the “but where are you really from?” question. Being the “perfect” Indian-American is not enough in America, or India, as my parents’ experiences indicate. Similarly, being the “perfect” deaf person is not enough to smoothly navigate hearing spaces. In short, being the “perfect” model of a minority that fits into dominant norms is still not enough to gain total acceptance.

In 2013, Nina Davuluri became the first Miss America of South Asian origin

So, is there ever a way that we can become enough? While the acceptance of others may be beyond our control, I propose that it is possible for those of us who feel trapped by these paradoxes and stereotypes to become enough for ourselves. We must recognize that it is okay to feel conflicted and confused. We must practice self-care, giving ourselves an outlet to express ourselves and just be. For me, that takes the form of painting, working out at the gym, and playing Pokémon. For you, that might look like baking some cookies, watching Netflix, or blasting some Beyoncé in your bedroom. It is important to recognize that there is no one right way to take care of yourself – do what feels right for you at this point in time and recognize that it is okay if that changes. Navigating these challenges can seem insurmountable sometimes, but giving yourself permission to exist as you are can help you start taking those first steps of confidence forward.

Be like Aishwarya Rai and don’t hold any part of yourself back for anyone.

Resource Round-Up
UMBC Women’s Center Women of Color Coalition – We discuss various issues pertaining to self-identified women of color every other week. I am one of the peer facilitators, so come say hi and share your experiences!
Women of Color – Telling Our Stories
“Twice as Good” On Being a Woman of Color and Overcoming Imposter Syndrome and Perfectionism
Asian American Identities
The Truth about “The Asian Advantage” and “Model Minority Myth”
6 Reasons We Need to Dismantle the Model Minority Myth of Those ‘Hard-Working’ Asians
It’s Time to Talk: South Asian Women in the U.S. Have Some of the Highest Suicide Rates
Deaf/Hard of Hearing Identities
American Deaf Culture
Terminology

Get ready for Critical Social Justice: Home with our “What You Need to Know” series.

Last year’s Critical Social Justice: Baltimore 365 was dedicated to understanding the historic and current day complexities and realities of Baltimore City. In the wake of the Baltimore Uprising, the CSJ planning team felt (and still does feel) deeply committed to creating more opportunities for our campus community to connect with and understand Baltimore. This year’s CSJ theme of Home allows for the conversation and learning about Baltimore to continue.

How does a legacy of residential segregation impact the creation and/or destruction of “home” in Baltimore? 

What does it mean to “be home” for residents of Baltimore City? 

Which Baltimore neighborhoods are perceived as homes? And, which ones are perceived as less than? How does race, gender, and socioeconomic status show up in our responses? 

How does policing in Baltimore and the recent release of the Department of Justice report impact the reality of home? 

This year, all incoming first-year and transfer students were asked to read Not in My Neighborhood: How Bigotry Shaped a Great American City by Antero Pietila which tells the story of how racial segregation came to be and what its impact is through the story of Baltimore. Mr. Pietila will be visiting campus to explore some of the questions above (and more) at this year’s New Student Book Experience event on Thursday, October 13th. This is a great way to kick-off Critical Social Justice: Home and we hope to see many of you there!

For more details about the New Student Book Experience “Meet the Author” event, visit the event post on myUMBC. 

1.  Tell us a little about yourself…

Hi! I’m Ryan, a tutor with the LRC, and a math/economics double major. I’m a transfer student who came from Carroll Community College, and am now in my senior year.

2.  Tell us about how you are involved on campus.

I’m president of the Japanese Student Association. We believe in closing the East-West gap one person at a time, by providing language and cultural topics to give students the tools they need to reach across the Pacific. We meet Wednesdays at free hour in Sondheim 112! Come visit us! All right, shameless plug out of the way. I’m also in the accelerated pathway program in economics, a TA for econ 101, and I’m doing independent research in economics, so I’m all over the place.

3.  How long have you been a tutor? 

I’ve been a tutor since the beginning of the year. I came in last semester to tutor economics, and ended up tutoring calculus too. I’ll always remember my very first tutoring session, about trigonometric integrals. Good times.

4.  How and why did you get involved in being a tutor?

“How” is easy:  I filled out the form on their website. They make it super easy for potential tutors to apply. “Why” is a little more involved. Obviously it’s a job so there’s money involved, but that’s really not the point. It helps keep me sharp in subjects I may have taken years ago, it’s a good item for my resume, and of course, the joy of helping people learn is unparalleled.

5.  What is your favorite thing about being a tutor?

My favorite thing is the part, after a few sessions, where you and your student aren’t a tutor and a student anymore—but just friends, one of whom happens to know more about the topic. A close second is when I walk into my tutoring room and find a whole solid piece of chalk, and it practically radiates.

6.  Why should students utilize the tutoring?

Why shouldn’t students utilize the tutoring? It’s free, we cater to your schedule, and there are no obligations except to show up each week. If you want to improve your grades, or even if your grades are fine but you want to make sure they stay that way, come to tutoring. And if you really don’t like it, we can cancel your appointments and give your slot to someone else. (I’ll miss you, though, of course.)

7.  What advice would you give students about how to prepare for a tutoring session?

Make an earnest attempt beforehand to study and understand the material on your own. The lecture sets out the mold, and your studies pour into the mold to create your understanding. Tutoring is a revision process, to fix any problems in your understanding. If you don’t try to understand and come in with specific things you didn’t get, I’ll just lecture, but you already heard a lecture. (Shoutout to all my students this semester for doing great on this. You guys rock.)

8.  When and where can someone work with you through the Learning Resources Center?

I tutor Econ 101 at 11 on Mondays and 1 on Thursdays, Econ 102 at noon on Thursdays, and then Phys 112 at 10 and at 4 on Wednesdays and noon on Fridays. 

I’m always happy to help!